Amber commented on my post below about the temptation to wonder if a child has a better chance of coming out a lover of the Catholic faith if she is not actually raised Catholic.
I know what you mean – as an adult convert who has seen so many lukewarm and fallen away Catholics I too wonder how to keep my kids from joining that group.
…I think that it can’t just be a matter of the head – cramming them full of knowledge about the faith and hoping that’s enough. They have to fall in love with the faith and fall in love with Christ – their hearts have to open to him and to his Church. But you can’t force love! All you can do is create moments for intimacy and closeness, try your hardest to keep out that which would create obstacles and pray that they are open enough to hear God calling to them. I think too many parents when raising their children in the faith focus too much on the head and not enough on the heart, leaving them with an anemic faith that can’t withstand the rigors of puberty and early adulthood….
Gee thanks Amber. This is exactly what I worry about! For me the "head," or brain anyway, is so much easier. It takes all kinds, right? Well, my kind is an extremely cerebral, not-very-visceral Faith. I don’t relate very much to it on an emotional or "gut" or "heart" level. It’s just not my way; I don’t relate very much to anything on that level. I’m just a "brain" person. (not the same as a head case)
Being a "head" or "brain" kind of person, and being a homeschooling parent, and looking around and seeing a huge number of people who obviously haven’t (a) been well catechized or (b) ever learned how to think logically — just look at how most people react to, say, statistics — my impulse is mainly to inoculate my kids against ignorance and wrongheaded thinking.
Study the Bible. Memorize the catechism. Learn Church history. Stimulate the thinking with well-chosen works of Christian literature, exegesis, and theology (not to mention plenty of mathematics and natural science, because you’ve got to understand Creation to really appreciate the Creator). Teach rhetoric and logic.
I think I am going to have to rely on others to help with the "heart" part. Some of that has already started. And anyway, the ways of the heart are hard to see from the outside. Who knows what will inflame this child or that? There are certain aspects of mathematics that give me a religious thrill, a kind of cerebral ecstasy. So do parts of the liturgy. So has the experience of being married and raising children, just in and of themselves.
Oscar was asking me some questions the other day. I didn’t know the answer — it was one of those "nobody knows" questions, not something you could look up. (UPDATE. Oh, I remember — he asked me what was the first language on earth.)
He said, "I think God made some questions that are so interesting but you can’t know the answer, so that we would want to go to heaven where we can find out."
And I thought — that’s it! That’s the essence of this brain-faith thing that I have, that feels so awkward in a room full of heart-faith people. Some people express their desire for heaven as a desire to see the face of the Lord. For me it feels a little more like a desire to know His mind. God is Love and God is Truth. Maybe Love and Truth are one thing.
Maybe a desire for perfect truth that, receiving it, responds with truth — though comparably neglected in our tradition — is as much a means of salvation as is a desire for perfect love that, receiving it, responds with love.
bearing blog 