Condolences.

I turned to the other mother, whose small boy had just kissed my 10-month-old on the top of the head, and said, "Oh, he likes babies a lot!"

"Yeah, I guess so," she shrugged.  "I should have had another one."  Then she muttered, "Too late for that."

"Oh –"  I never know what to say when some one says as much.   It shocks me, not because it’s shocking that people have gotten sterilized, but that they’re so willing to volunteer that information.  It seems as if it should be private.  Surprisingly often, when they say it, they are audibly sorrowful.  I wonder if there is some deep need to tell these stories.  Like the women and men of Silent No More who tell their stories in hope of warning other women to avoid the grief that often follows abortion, maybe these tied-and-cut women are quietly passing along their sadness, however slight, to the rest of us. 

I offer an expression and "hm" of sympathy, and sometimes I say "I’m sorry."  None yet have seemed to take offense.  It seems the only decent thing to say.

(Cross posted at HMS Blog.  If I don’t double up for a while I’ll never get a decent amount written here.)