Yesterday afternoon my almost-four-year-old was angry at his brother, so he ripped up one of my paperback books.
I said, "Don't rip up my book! It makes me sad!"
He said, "It's okay, mommy. It'll be fine."
I said, "No, it won't. The book is broken now. I can't read it anymore. It's ruined. That makes me sad."
He said, "I was mad at [the 10-year-old]."
I said, "I'm angry at you!"
He looked concerned and asked: "Will you be mad at me all of the times?"
I was mixing up medicine for his sister and I paused. "I will be mad until I calm down," I said.
He looked at me quite seriously and then said firmly: "Mommy!"
"What?" I was back at the sink.
"Take a deep breath!"
He pronounced it "breff."
I paused again and turned around. He was standing there, his head level with the countertop, looking at me expectantly.
I inhaled.
He pantomimed exhaling, exaggerating the motion of his chin and head.
I exhaled, feeling the corner of my lip curl upwards. I suppressed it. "Now what?"
"Take a deep breath again," he told me.
I inhaled. He pantomimed exhaling. I exhaled.
"Now what?" I asked again.
"Now you are all calmed down," he said. And he went off to play.
And you know, he was right.