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The cost of shouting.

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2 comments on The cost of shouting.

You know, I had a sort of "McQueary moment" a few years ago, when I was driving.  I witnessed what I assume was an episode of extremely dangerous domestic violence.  

I, instinctively, yelled out the window of my car.  

If I had been thinking instead of reacting instinctively, if I had intellectually known or even reasonably predicted what was going to happen next, maybe I wouldn't have gotten involved.  The immediate aftermath was to put myself and my three children (and an unknown number of nearby pedestrians) in serious danger.  Thankfully — briefly.

 I told the story in a blog post later that day.  I can remember my fingers shaking as I typed.  I can remember peeping out the window for a few weeks afterward, senselessly afraid that somehow the danger would follow me home.

I can imagine the scenario, post-shout unfolding in a few different ways, none of which was "safe" for me or for my kids.

But I keep thinking now about the instinct to yell.  It was immediate and involved no thought.  I saw violence — someone endangering someone else.   

I shouted.  

I had my own young children with me.  I had reason to have physical fear for all our own safety.

And I still shouted.

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2 responses to “The cost of shouting.”

  1. Jennifer G. Miller Avatar
    Jennifer G. Miller

    I’ve had different kinds of reactions — I’ve had that kind of slow motion, “this can’t be happening, why can’t I move” kind of thing, I’ve run away, and I’ve fought. There’s no telling how you would react unless you were right there and totally in his shoes. The poor man. He isn’t perfect, didn’t have the “right” reaction, and yet still reported it, knowing that now his lack of reaction would be under scrutiny. His name is mud and life is ruined. He did speak up, and now he is ridiculed, threatened, and criticized severely.
    It’s amazing how perfect everyone else is. This also is a great example why so few come forward to Whistle Blow in any circumstance. Even though they are trying to rectify a situation, even if their reporting is done poorly, their life will be in shambles, too. None of this experience at PSU will help bring abuse down, because the anger is being leveled at the wrong people.

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  2. bearing Avatar
    bearing

    Jennifer: He did not speak up to anyone outside the organization until before the grand jury. The best anyone can say is that he did not commit perjury.
    You are correct that he did not “have the ‘right’ reaction.” The scare quotes are unnecessary; and actually there were more than one possible ways to react that could be characterized as right. All of them, however, included making some kind of noise, if not in that day and hour, then sometime in the subsequent weeks, months, and years.

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