“Only.”

Alice Bradley of finslippy has a beautiful post about her one son Henry.

Of course I know, rationally, that only children can be happy and successful. I know that Henry's happy and well-adjusted and loved beyond measure. I do.

But it keeps coming up. They think I'm selfish, I think, when other parents ask me if Henry is an "only." Stingy. Not willing to spread myself just a little too thin. I want to give them my reasons. My very good, well-considered reasons. But I'm afraid they'd argue that those reasons aren't enough.

A lot of her commenters have written to say that they understand and completely get what she is saying.  I am not someone who can completely get it.  I will have four children soon.  I can't imagine having only one and deciding to stop trying for another child.  But then, I have never suffered a miscarriage, and even if I ever do (God forbid), I won't experience it the same way she and her family experienced theirs.  I don't want to pretend that I can imagine how she feels or what she and her husband went through.  It would not be fair or honest.

 I am grateful that she let us in and wrote the post.